I frequently hear moms talk about feeling guilty about leaving their kids, guilty for wanting free time, guilty for taking care of themselves. Today, as I was finishing my yoga class, I felt inspired to remind myself and others about the importance of guilt-free mommy time.
When the girls were around one I spiraled down into a bad place. I had just stopped working, Will was really busy starting a business, and I did nothing for myself. I wasn't exercising, I didn't have a social life, and I didn't have a housekeeper (sounds spoiled, I know). But I was drowning in being a housewife and was very unhappy.
This went on for almost a year. Thank God Will was working a lot because I was probably awful to be around. I remember being angry at him for getting a haircut. It was something I couldn't do without major planning and he could just do it, without even asking me first. I guess I was resentful that his life hadn't changed much and my whole life flipped upside down.
All at once, my girls started preschool, I started exercising, and I went back to work part time. The blues were gone. It was the first lesson that I am the only one who can make me happy. Kids, husband, family are all part of my happiness equation but without myself it doesn't add up. There have been a few moments since then where I get back into the pattern of forgetting about myself. Every single time I start the downward spiral. Fortunately, I now know immediately what will cure the blues, Dani Time!
Date night, girls night, solo vacation, couples vacation, gym time, yoga time, taking a shower with the door closed and no one bothering me time.... These are the things that keep me happy. And when I am happy, my whole house is happy. Cliche but true.
Take time for yourself and enjoy it...guilt-free.
